I think a lot of people look at me and think they instantly understand my challenges. I'm either using crutches or in a wheelchair. It's a no-brainer, right? It's a challenge, sure. The world is not made of curb cuts and convenient parking spaces. I can't do everything I want to, but most of us can't do everything we want to. I think most people would be surprised to know that I don't consider my disability my biggest challenge. I think our biggest challenges are always the challenges that aren't visible. The things you can see are just the game pieces you have when you start the game.

I admit to playing Castle Age on Facebook lately. I started out with whatever people start out with; I like a level playing field. I have been playing the game in my spare time for a little over a week now. I'm at level 28, and I have Elven armor, the most powerful general, and a total income of over $600,000 an hour. I have completely eliminated my enemy fifteen times and fought over a thousand battles, all while running my non-profit, keeping my home fires burning, and tending to the demands of two small children. I find myself somewhat frustrated how easy for it is me to amass wealth in computer games, and yet Asha and I have not managed to circumnavigate our financial worries in the real world. Yet. And there's one of my challenges.

I obviously understand manifestation on a core level. I should be out of this wheelchair and sitting on a pile of unallocated cash by now. Seriously. Anyone who doesn't understand how serious a statement this is doesn't know me very well. I understand myself and the world as energetic vibration. That's all we are. I understand the world as a giant computer game which we are all playing. This world is no more or less real than the one I have been playing in on my PC. I know that I am as capable of manipulating my life experience here on earth as I am capable of manipulating my computer game, so why are things still happening in my life that I have felt ready to move on from for years, like debt?

And I think of someone like 70s icon Farrah Fawcett, who's in the middle of her own psychic battle with her body and has said that it's extremely frustrating to her that she can't just talk herself out of her devastating cancer. She knows what I know. I know she does, because she made that statement, and yet she cannot will herself out of this situation. Everything she's tried has failed to save her mortal life. I understand, just as she does, that I am capable of rising beyond this fretful 3-D experience at any moment, and yet I still can't walk. But, my challenge about this is not the walking or lack thereof; my challenge is to figure out how to speak my truth about what I know and about who and what we are and what we are capable of.

I often feel like my ability to speak in my native language was somehow damaged, and I have to speak in a language that doesn't have an adequate vocabulary to explain what I need to explain. Anything I say in this limited language sounds crazy—even to myself sometimes. How's that for a challenge? The language that I want to speak has no language. The language that I want to speak is pure vibration, but how do I communicate with people who either don't know or have forgotten how to communicate in this way?

Putting aside for the moment the challenges of my present day, I want to go back a few years to the time just before I met Asha. I had laid myself open to the will of the universe. I was actually praying every night to the point where I would be in tears. It was a very private battle. I did not even know what I was asking for, but I knew I needed whatever it was. Somehow I had to unlock the door to the next quest, because the alternative was to turn around and go back the way I came, and I knew that wasn't right. And as it turns out, that knowing, in and of itself, was the key. I opened that door. I met and married someone who not only completely understands everything I am saying about this language I'm no longer able to speak, she has the same frustration.

Things have happened for us very quickly since we've been together. Energetically, we have accelerated each other. I find that it's much easier to speak my truth now that I have a someone who understands at my side; however, I still struggle about how to communicate with others. What I think it ultimately comes down to is that illness, disability, and concern are vibrational communications. We cannot let go of the only avenue we currently have for communicating. We must replace this vibrational communication with a higher vibrational communication in order to move on from it. I believe that what we now call death is the highest vibration we can currently reach; therefore, people like Farrah, and the thousands of other people who leave the planet every day, are communicating at the highest level that we've understood up to this point. Many people who are crossing now are communicating at a higher vibrational level and are therefore helping to raise the energetic vibration of the planet. Soon our understanding of living and dying will change.

Isn't it true that when we play a game, there is always a part of us that wants to know what the ultimate outcome is? What happens when we have all the cash, all the armor, all the armies, and every possible castle? What happens when you have the most cash flow possible, or nothing left at all, and you get to the place where there is simply no more game. I've noticed that there are some people in my Castle Age army who are on level 80 or above. The cash flows in, and you cream anyone you try to battle. My plan is to just stop playing when I get to whatever level satisfies my curiosity about how the game progresses. My plan—and I've had this plan since about level 10—is to stop stashing my cash and leave the millions there for the other people having fun behind me to pillage. I suspect some people have already done this. Doesn't that make it a different game entirely?

I wonder how I will experience the game in this state of altered consciousness. I wonder what I'll learn. This is the challenge we all face in these dynamic moments of earth experience. There are those who say that the program's run its course. Let's just blow it up because that's about the only thing we haven't all experienced at level 2012. I say we haven't even begun to experience ourselves if we think this way.