Each of us will spend years or our entire lifetime working on our healing, seeking that path to pure joy, attempting to live in the moment, and opening our hearts to ourselves, to others, and to the greater Love from which we came and which is the only thing that really exists. And in this process, we will wander, stumble, doubt, and even despair of ever finding our way as we experience the life lessons that shape our healing process and ultimately allow us to gain the true Holy Grail:  the God within us. Yet we persevere, because we must. To stop trying is to stop evolving, to stop living. In our own way, we each try to heal ourselves. Our process may appear to be harmful or misguided to others, but it is ours, no matter how imperfect it may seem.

Eventually, we understand intellectually what must be healed. We see the patterns in ourselves, we know that old hurts are holding us back, we feel the tug of guilt or anger, and we get it. Yet healing can remain elusive. We have good moments, and we rejoice in our progress; then, the old feeling returns, and we may feel more unhealed than ever. It can be really frustrating.

Healing, however, is a journey without a specific destination. Instead, it is a journey with numerous stops along the way, and these stops are what make the journey worthwhile. These stops are why we are here. When we reach one, we "level up" in the Game of Life, because that's all this is:  a game that our God-selves, or our Higher Selves, are playing through us. As with any game, the purpose is to have fun. Could we, as individualizations of the One God Mind, manage to convince a part of ourselves that we were separate from God? And if we could, what would it feel like to wake up again and return to our original consciousness?

So here we are, believing things that are not true about ourselves:  that we are separate, that we are imperfect, that we are powerless, and that anything besides Love could ever exist. We believe these things by design. We believe these things because we were so successful at creating this game. Logically, then, why is healing so hard? Why is waking up so hard? Because it wouldn't be any fun if it were easy. A game isn't fun if it isn't challenging.

Why bother if it's all just a game? We bother because we cannot be happy until we find our healing. We bother because we are alive. Healing is the process of following our own inner guidance. When you follow this, you will always be in the Right Place at the Right Time. And the miracle is, even if you miss a few steps, you will always be led to where you need to be. It will always happen, because you cannot fail, and God will never abandon you. And when you have those moments of supreme frustration and believe that you will never get it and everything feels hopeless, you are closer to the miracle than ever.

Healing is also a process of surrendering to your own inner guidance. Surrender means that you are giving up control. This is painfully difficult for the ego, and the ego cannot do this. But your Divine Self can, and when the going gets tough, you are being challenged to let go and let that guidance do the work. The truth is that you cannot heal yourself, but God can heal you. After you take responsibility for your healing and walk the path and do all that is in your power to heal, you will reach a point where you can do more, and Divine Grace will do the rest.

I recently had a "level up" experience like this. I have spent years working with my inner child and had come a long way. I took responsibility, I understood my emotional landscape, I understood what happened in my childhood and why I felt the way I did. I had compassion for all those involved and understood their inner children, too. I had integrated as much as I could into my mental and emotional bodies, and yet I felt I had reached a wall, and I literally didn't know what else to do. There was no thinking my way out of it. I had done all the thinking already. There was only one thing left to do:  surrender it to God. I said, "Okay, I think I've done all I can do here. I need some help." And within only a few short weeks, I was directed to attend a trance channeling.

Before we attended this event, we understood some of the reasons for being guided there. We knew that we needed to meet these people and that they were probably members of our soul family. But in typically inscrutable Spirit Guide fashion, the only other thing they would say is, "This will change your life." So we went in with an open mind and heart, waiting to see what would transpire.

I have been around many psychics and channelers, of course—that's what we do as well. But this was my first physical experience with a trance channeler, and while I expected that this being would say many relevant, important, and fascinating things, I did not realize that most of what would happen had nothing to do with the words that came through the channeler. When a person allows themselves to be used as a trance channel, it allows that energy to come into the physical space. In essence, the channeler's body becomes a portal for Spirit—and not just for the channeled guide, but for all Light. So when this being "arrived," a higher vibration settled into the room and affected everyone in it physically, emotionally, psychically, and spiritually.

There were many things that were said and told to me that took a weight off my soul, but the most important event of that day was that the final healing was done for me, divinely and without words:  the psychic wound I had been suffering as a result of having to cut off my parents was released. As this loving being said to me, "You do not have to DO anything." And indeed, when it came to my final healing on this matter, I did not. I simply had to allow it and get out of the way.

No matter how much you struggle, no matter how much pain you've endured, there is always an end to it. Healing is a process of change, and you must do your part. You must cooperate in your own healing. But in the end, when you've done all that you can, know that Grace is a real thing. You don't have to do anything to "deserve" Grace. You don't have to be perfect or saintly to experience it. You just have to relinquish control and let it be. The miracle awaits you at that Right Time and Right Place, at that next healing stop where you level up your game. The Universe is conspiring to help you reach that place. Hop on board the train and trust the conductor.

When I find myself in times of trouble, mother Mary comes to me,
speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
And in my hour of darkness she is standing right in front of me,
speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
—John Lennon/Paul McCartney